Righting Myself
Nov. 15th, 2011 05:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ceitfiannaGEMINI (May 21-June 20): In Santa Cruz there used to be a nightclub that
featured live rock bands on a big stage but enforced a strict policy
forbidding its patrons from dancing. The one time I went there, the music
was loud and infectious, and I naturally felt the urge to move in vigorous
rhythm. Moments after I launched into my groove, a bouncer accosted me
and forced me to stop. I think this situation has certain resemblances to
the one you're in now, Gemini. Some natural response mechanism in you is
being unduly inhibited; some organic inclination is being unreasonably
restrained or dampened. Why should you continue to accept this?
Once again Unce Rob is incredibly on the nose. I feel like I spent most of yesterday having to find ways to say things, so people wouldn't be angry while I was worn out and a mess.
Other than the job stuff, most of what's been going on with me is working to make lots of things fall into line. I was woken this morning with a question about my healthcare that I'm signing up for and I don't know the best way to contact the government to say, I can't afford to pay back my loans yet. And my well meaning parents are poking me about it which makes me fret. If we were RPing or anything yesterday especially after about 5:30 pm, I was so quiet because I was working to find my balance again. Today I've been working on healing myself and giving myself permission to go, the interaction I had was horrible. My supervisor looked over the transcript and said I did the right thing and she's sorry I had to go through it.
I spent a huge part of today wandering around Barnes and Noble and finally ended up buying The Goat Rodeo Sessions by some of my favorite artists. For dinner I'll have another tasty night of leftover tamale pie. Next time I make it, I think I'll use tomato paste or sauce instead of just diced tomatoes, it will stick together better.
In other things I'm proud of, I made a gorgeous collage of Flat Stanley pictures for my niece that I'm going to send. It's more than a month later and I hope that's okay. Things are getting better and by this time next week, I'll be on the East Coast with my family and for that I'm incredibly grateful. Soon I'll be putting up a post to collect addresses as I'll be making and sending out holiday cards and maybe writing some fic gifts. I haven't decided on the second one yet, but I probably will as I love writing gifts.
featured live rock bands on a big stage but enforced a strict policy
forbidding its patrons from dancing. The one time I went there, the music
was loud and infectious, and I naturally felt the urge to move in vigorous
rhythm. Moments after I launched into my groove, a bouncer accosted me
and forced me to stop. I think this situation has certain resemblances to
the one you're in now, Gemini. Some natural response mechanism in you is
being unduly inhibited; some organic inclination is being unreasonably
restrained or dampened. Why should you continue to accept this?
Once again Unce Rob is incredibly on the nose. I feel like I spent most of yesterday having to find ways to say things, so people wouldn't be angry while I was worn out and a mess.
Other than the job stuff, most of what's been going on with me is working to make lots of things fall into line. I was woken this morning with a question about my healthcare that I'm signing up for and I don't know the best way to contact the government to say, I can't afford to pay back my loans yet. And my well meaning parents are poking me about it which makes me fret. If we were RPing or anything yesterday especially after about 5:30 pm, I was so quiet because I was working to find my balance again. Today I've been working on healing myself and giving myself permission to go, the interaction I had was horrible. My supervisor looked over the transcript and said I did the right thing and she's sorry I had to go through it.
I spent a huge part of today wandering around Barnes and Noble and finally ended up buying The Goat Rodeo Sessions by some of my favorite artists. For dinner I'll have another tasty night of leftover tamale pie. Next time I make it, I think I'll use tomato paste or sauce instead of just diced tomatoes, it will stick together better.
In other things I'm proud of, I made a gorgeous collage of Flat Stanley pictures for my niece that I'm going to send. It's more than a month later and I hope that's okay. Things are getting better and by this time next week, I'll be on the East Coast with my family and for that I'm incredibly grateful. Soon I'll be putting up a post to collect addresses as I'll be making and sending out holiday cards and maybe writing some fic gifts. I haven't decided on the second one yet, but I probably will as I love writing gifts.
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no subject
Date: 2011-11-16 04:19 am (UTC)Your alma mater's financial aid office should be able to help you figure out how to contact your loan holders, and they can also give you information on consolidating them at a lower interest rate if that's possible. HtB did that when he graduated and it was a big help. I hope they can give you some advice that will make things less stressful.
Yay for tamale pie and holidays! *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2011-11-16 04:24 am (UTC)Tamale pie is really tasty and gives lots of leftovers. I'm going to add it to my dishes that will feed me for many days list of recipes.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-18 03:30 am (UTC)I love your Flat Stanley pics - I got kind of sad to see him outside the Borders and then excited to see him outside the MI Theater!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-18 03:43 am (UTC)Thank you, I debated about including the Borders' pic but Borders is part of Ann Arbor. Also I had such fun taking the photos and trying to make the perspective work.
We need to connect some weekend as my Saturdays tend to be open and do a watch through of awesome things.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-21 08:23 pm (UTC)But the second weekend in December, like the 10th, my sister is going out of town for the weekend and I imagined I would just lay around in my pajamas all weekend, but then instead I was thinking you could come down and we could occupy the living room. I tried to pick up XMen:FC at the store the other day but they only had it on blu-ray. But something I have never seen that I thought you might own is Wanted. You could come down for the afternoon/evening and if you wanted, or the weather was nasty, you could spend the night in the sister's bed.
You still have my number? You should call when you get back from your holiday.
Have a good trip and enjoy your family!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-22 09:00 pm (UTC)Have you see Shakespeare Retold with James as MacBeth since that's one of my favorite roles of his and I have that along with Becoming Jane.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-22 10:07 pm (UTC)My sister has On A Clear Day starring Billy Boyd - and unlike a lot of the movies we buy just for the actors in them, On A Clear Day is actually a good movie, totally one we kept for rewatching. My sis actually asked if you have seen Donnie Darko because she thought you might like that. She is right, if you haven't seen it, you would love it. I have never bee so creeped by a movie (not scared persay but just creeped out) and yet had my brain so fired up. My gears turn for hours after watching that movie.
We could intersperse it with some SPN Life or LotR Trivial Pursuit. (yes, we are geeky enough to own things like LOTR Trivial Pursuit - though I suspect that much like when I play my sister, you will kick my ass. It's cool, I'm a good sport).
Hope the vacation is going well, and the meetings about the library stuff!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-22 10:10 pm (UTC)Thank you. So far I'm trying not to be sick and slowly checking things off my list of stuff to do.
Trivial Pursuit sounds like a lot of fun.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-23 02:44 am (UTC)Excellent. It's a plan then!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-23 02:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-23 02:50 am (UTC)It's the winter crud - it seems to have come early this year.
(your icon looks so sad and yet makes me so happy. His face!)
no subject
Date: 2011-11-23 02:53 am (UTC)Hee, I get that. When I was in high school I was in the marching band so my talking and hearing always suffered for a couple of months and my dad is hard of hearing so I talk louder around him.
Yes, there's so much winter crud. Both my parents have it and I'm dealing with it, but there's tea and I don't have to do as much which helps.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-26 10:04 pm (UTC)I assume we are talking about the recent Narnia movies and not the BBC ones that came out when we were kids? (which I did not care for because Lucy felt all wrong to me - I can't remember now but maybe she just wasn't a good actress). But the recent movies - when I saw my first preview in the movie theater, I sobbed. Right there in the theater during the trailers. Just...sobbed.
It was like coming home.
So yeah, I own that. I quite liked the second and third one as well, but haven't splurged for those yet. But TL,TWaTW is like the best book adaptation I have ever seen.
It's the first time I ever actually heard of James.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-26 10:08 pm (UTC)My weird thing for the Narnia books is I've yet to read the last one even though I own it because I don't want the series to be over. Now I kind of wish I was at my place so I could rewatch Narnia, it's just an amazing movie.
My only complaint with it is the scene with Tumnus and Edmund in the Witch's palace, it was a twist in the gut that I don't think was needed. It was done incredibly well but it just felt too much for me.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-27 11:05 pm (UTC)I don't ever expect movie adaptations to be good or stick to the source material as much as TL,TWandTW did.
I have never read the book about The Professor when he was a kid. It's the only one I haven't read. We were slowly buying them in hardcover for my mother, when we were children, every Christmas a new one and that was the last of them. By that time, I already had this idea in my head about The Professor and I could never bring myself to read it. I should now.
Tumnus and Edmund at the Witch's - lots of people had that complaint. I think it is a matter of trust - trust that the actor playing Edmund could portray all of the internal emotions we see in the book and trust that the audience would understand it. I do love when movie makers trust their audience more, but both Skandar and James were so amazing in that scene that I can't bring myself to care too overly much that the scene wasn't really needed.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-28 12:28 am (UTC)It was a fantastic scene, they did a great job with it, but it just broke my heart a lot.