ceitfianna: (dreams)
This weekend was lovely, my parents and I headed out to Gloucester for the Peabody Essex museum, Hammond Castle and getting rained on a lot, but it was a nice break. Today started early and I ended up actually having a quiet day after getting on the road as I've felt sick most of the day. Which is annoying as today is my actual birthday but I'm from a family where birthdays spread out.

I have things that will make it last in great ways like a Lego to put together and money to spend on books and other fun stuff. I'm tired but hopeful as I watch the Tonys and head into my next year.
ceitfianna: (four elements)
I'm enjoying a Sunday off after a busy week where I went to New York City with my parents to see the opera La Rondine and wander around the Met and the city. The opera was fascinating as its by Puccini about a courtesan who falls in love while pretending to be someone else and then ends up going back to the man keeping her. Its both light and not so when it ends, we were all expecting someone to die but then they didn't. The music was glorious with three fourths of the main cast having their debut that night and it was the season premiere which added to the enjoyment. The soprano was amazing, a truly soaring voice and the set was full of gorgeous Art Nouveau elements.

That morning we went to the Met museum to look at the Cycladic art and the Grounded in Clay exhibit which has some of the best museum write ups that I've seen. It really was put together as the present and the past of Pueblo pottery being in conversation with each other.

The next day was basically going from bookstore to bookstore which ended up with tired feet and goodies to eat in our rooms. On the train home, I read the new Incryptid novel which was one of those that was so good and hurt.

By the time I got back to work on Friday, I was feeling happily worn out and then was met with so many boxes of books. I unpacked them for four hours and had one moment of annoyance as sort of supervisor actually went and found one book of fiction to do herself. There hasn't been much luck on the new job front.

As I'm on Sunday, I found Oliver and Company, one of the first movies I ever remember seeing in a theater on TV. And its Spring which always makes me feel hopeful.
ceitfianna: (Charles+Raven-here to hold you)
Damn it, turns out I didn't get the job at my library, not enough programming experience and didn't even get to an interview at the other library before they hired someone else. I hate this, because I know that's my weak spot, I'm open about it in interviews, but they know how fast I learn and connect with other people. They're been working with me for around two years. I know everyone wants to hire someone who knows everything but as a librarian I hate this bit since I'm never going to learn how to do programming if I'm never hired to do it. And I know I'd be good at it too. At the wedding, I was talking with some fellow librarians about how weird this profession can be about what you've done and how that fits into what you should do. My career hasn't fit any particular idea of what I think people expect so even though I have lots of experience, I don't as easily fit into this to that.

Also for all that they say oh you're so impressive but we're not hiring you, I just hate it. It makes me not want to stay because it feels like, I'm good enough for some things but not others. I know it probably was a case of someone else came in and was great and I wasn't promised anything, I know that. Its just this was the fourth job I've applied for there and not got it combined with I was going to do some extra hours as there are holes in the schedule. And they went oh, right, you actually can't do that as we can't risk you going over the too many hours, we have to give you benefits threshold. So I'm just feeling stuck and taken for granted.

The wedding this weekend was wonderful, so many great people and conversations in lovely places. I was a little shy and anxious in the run up thinking oh I'm not enough and getting in my head, but got there and it was amazing. So many moments of oh I know you and just connecting. I was able to spend some time with my brother which was also fun and my recovery from tooth stuff is going really well.

I'm going to go take a walk, do some shopping, cook something delicious for dinner and keep looking for other opportunities.
ceitfianna: (four elements)
I had a wonderful little trip with my parents, the travel both ways sucked as those days it rained or snowed, but during the days we were there, it was sunny. Not fully warm but nice weather for walking and it was kind of cool to see the Mystic museum not fully open, shrinkwrapped ships and how they were preparing for what came next. We also were able to catch the end of an incredibly cool exhibit of this giant panorama and have lots of long talks with volunteers.

Since I've been home, the weather's been getting warmer and my allergies have returned, also while I was away, my job contract was extended until June. And the rest of March is going to be busier which should be nice after a slow February. I also came home to my Girl Scout cookie order which made me smile.
ceitfianna: (fox kits)
I had a good Thanksgiving with my family and today had a long train ride and went from rain to snow. I didn't actually end up online that much this holiday and had a fun moment of my computer thinking it didn't have enough battery and shutting itself off.

Otherwise it seems fine, but I'm going to check in with Apple to see if maybe I need a new battery. The big stuff with my family is that my Dad had a fall and hurt his knee but thankfully nothing's broken and he's doing PT and trying to take care of it. Also my oldest niece is in her junior year of high school and thinking about colleges, this is so surreal but also cool. She also drove down to my parents' place since she got her license earlier in November.

Before the holidays, I have a lot of errands to get done; dentist, oil changed in my car, stuff like that along with fun things like writing for exchanges, presents and volunteering. At the moment, I'm glad to be home in my warm apartment as its snowy and cold outside.
ceitfianna: (flying in hyperspace)
I finally got all my icons back and added a few Star Wars ones but I want to add more. This is one of my favorites because its Cassian being a pilot and hyperspace which is cool and beautiful.

After I finished my college job, I started an over two week long vacation down at my parent's place by the shore. It turned out to be just what I needed after the last academic year.

Important thing that happened was I saw my mother's dentist twice, once for x-rays and for him to go, yes, you need a root canal and then the actual root canal. So now my tooth doesn't hurt and I'm not thinking constantly about my mouth. The dentist was really nice, his office was part of a very fancy dental complex and so while the whole process was long, it went fairly well.

For the Fourth of July, I made blueberry boy bait from a Smitten Kitchen recipe that was delicious but far too large a recipe for the small group that came to celebrate. If you ever want an easy recipe that makes a simple and very blueberry cake, I recommend this one. Later I also made a delicious blueberry and peach crumble when my brother and his wife stopped by for a quick visit. I was able to have soft shell crabs twice which are honestly one of my favorite parts of summer down by the Delaware shore.

We also had a fun and unexpectedly good visit out to the Air Mobility Command Museum that's right outside Dover. I've always had a love for aviation and my current interest in Star Wars has only added to it. This museum was really wonderfully done with the focus on all the planes and with really good and active volunteer docents. The museum was half inside and half outside and the day we went was really bright and sunny so going from the hangar to outside was intense.

Other than that, I spent a lot of time reading, a few walks though it was really hot and humid and planning what's next. I also had a phone interview with a school that went okay, it helped me think about recrafting my resume and things like that.

One wonderful thing that happened was the dwarf sunflower kit that I bought before my sister's memorial has finally bloomed. The plant's going to live down in my parent's garden where it can get more sun.

And I watched Good Omens, which was beautifully done but didn't completely work for me. The casting and the look of it was great but a lot of the choices made it more Gaiman's story not Pratchett's; too much focus on angels and demons, much less on the actual humans. Aziraphale and Crowley were amazing but I find it really telling how most of the fandom stuff I see about them isn't actually connected to the actual plot of the Apocalypse.
ceitfianna: (Charles+Raven-here to hold you)
Life has been very busy and strange the last couple of days and since I'm currently a little jet lagged, it feels even more so. So off and on in the last month or so, one of my teeth has been aching. I thought it was from grinding my teeth. The pain came to a head during my interview on Monday and the amazing woman in charge of my interview got me to a dentist. It turns out I had a broken tooth that was in bad shape, the dentist did something to hold me for a week or two until I can get taken care of. Today I've been feeling a little sore and tired since I didn't get home until 11:30 at night but better.

Now I'm looking back over the trip and looking ahead to my last week and a half at my current job and the jet lagged feeling is just about right.

Looking back, I'm trying to think about how I felt about Albuquerque and the school and its kind of hard since I didn't feel fully like myself. Everyone was nice, the place was beautiful, the library was huge and amazing and I think maybe I could see myself there. Normally after a visit like this, I'd feel more certain but I don't just yet. I'm going to keep thinking on it as they make their decision.

Next week I train my replacement and then have a nice break and reset. I'm hoping this week to maybe finish a fic that keeps being almost ready.

Floating

May. 2nd, 2019 06:07 pm
ceitfianna: (running towards a happy ending)
For the past couple of weeks other than a few notable exceptions like the day of my sister's memorial, the weather has been rainy or cloudy. That plus all the driving and traveling I've been doing has left me feeling not completely tethered to one place and that my apartment and my job and my family all strings anchoring me. Some are good anchors like my family that reminds me how loved I am and the wonderful people that my family connects to and makes me want to reach out to my friends and those that care for me.

Also my apartment with a growing windowsill garden that now includes tiny seedling sunflowers that weren't ready for my sister's memorial and hyacinths in a vase which were one of many gifts brought that day. My job is this strange mixture of students with all their busy lives, who share with me and bring me in, the constant and also shifting needs of the library while at the back is the sense of the school waiting to go, nope, done with you.

The travel has helped to center me as the driving gives me time to think on story ideas and get to know New England better. And driving helped me to a point of being with family and a true pause.

I went to Mystic, Connecticut the weekend before last and had a great time. I chose Mystic because of its Seaport museum and with the idea that it was farther south and would get me closer to family. Now I want to go back since I loved the Aquarium, the museum and its waterfront and would love to explore more of the area with all the history and funky shops.

Memorial talk below )

This week, work has been good, we're moving into end of the semester mode with endings feeling closer and schedules to arrange. The tricky sense of helping for next year when I won't be there is always there adding almost a doubling feeling.

Today helped give me a sense of what's next as I had a good all day interview at a school for a middle school librarian family leave position. It was a place I could see myself and I feel like I presented myself really well. After I got home, I wasn't ready to sit as I had odd energy and took the T into more of Boston to walk and think, which was a good feeling. I even ended up getting a character from a blind bag that I've been searching for.

Looking ahead, I want to meet up with Boston people as seeing my brother surrounded by these friends that he and my sister grew up with made me want my hanging out people. Life is full and good and I feel hopeful, while having pangs as I see something I wish I could share with my sister.
ceitfianna: (riding into the sun)
I'm so glad that I don't have to work tomorrow. I think I probably could but I drove back from NJ in the rain and I'm processing my sister's memorial. Last weekend at Mystic was great and I want to write more about that, but for now. I'm going to have a quiet night and catch up on online things and not do a lot. Tomorrow I have some chores to do but I'm going to try and not push myself too much.
ceitfianna: (breaking each other)
I just booked train tickets to go down this weekend to say goodbye to my sister who tomorrow is hopefully being moved to a hospice place. Fuck cancer, we knew she was failing after the holidays and probably wouldn’t get better in the rehab place but she’s just gotten a lot worse. Now she’s in the hospital and ugh. I’m glad that I can be there to say my goodbye and to be with my parents and the rest of my family.

And its also the first week of classes at my job, its actually all going fairly well. I had a desk shift that was busy but not too chaotic. But I’m not really there, I need to be where my heart is and that’s with my family.

Back Home

Nov. 25th, 2018 07:34 pm
ceitfianna: (Dean time rambles on)
I’m home after a good Thanksgiving that involved lots of time with family, some cooking and shopping. My sister wasn’t doing great but she’s starting a new round of meds and chemo which hopefully will help and get her out of the difficult limbo we’ve all been in. I enjoyed doing a lot of reading especially on the train ride especially a fascinating book called Last Hope Island about the role of the United Kingdom and truly London during World War II.

I’m also having the rather surreal experience of going through the interview process for the job I currently have since its an open job. So I’m through the first round and will soon be having a phone interview with my current boss and the search committee.

Having a break has also reenergized some of my writing as did this book. I’m hoping in December to get some more writing done including for fun things like the Cassian prompt-a-thon and working more on my Yuletide.
ceitfianna: (Charles/Erik-remake the world)
three slightlybowed windows with lighting entering

This is the living room of my new place where I'm currently camping out. My stuff which I was hoping would arrive tomorrow is instead appearing at the end of the week. As often happens with movers, there's a delivery window and at first it seemed like I would be at the front end, am now at the back. Weirdly I think that the internet will arrive before the stuff.

But that's okay as today I felt like I was a porter going on a major mountain trek as I brought supplies up like an aero-bed, my electric kettle, bathroom stuff and a few kitchen things. There's still more in my car but I feel prepared. I've also started to explore the neighborhoods around me and I think I've landed in a really good place.

My cold's still around and that plus my asthma has left me worn out but good. Now to start the long process of changing my address with everyone that I can think of.

Its so strange to be doing something this hopeful with the mess of everything around but I know if I'd delayed too long on moving, I'd get stuck. Now I'm here and can keep moving forward and learn how to be most effective here.
ceitfianna: (Allpocalypse)
My day today went from getting going on a good schedule to annoyed at the hotel and then curled up in a snow day. I'm not too far from Boston and have done some arranging for my job thing tomorrow, not everything was moved but I sent messages.

This hotel is one I won't be coming back because even though its a chain I like and near the highway, the way they acted this morning was awful. So I wasn't the only one trying to leave this morning and I said I was checking out. Then I went to my car, got my stuff inside, cleared it off, everything started and I was able to back out and then got stuck. That all took me half an hour, I know they were busy but I feel like if you have a hotel with snow expected, check in a lot with people. Weirdly, there were two guys in a pick up truck just sitting there. I still don't know if they were watching me or what.

So I went in, cold, wet and annoyed because the side door locked and I'd turned in my key. I get in and try to get the front desk attention, they finally try and help me because I'd pulled my car out enough to block the snow plow. After a lot of yelling and some more interactions where they really didn't seem to trust that I knew my car, we got it back into its parking spot. Another woman who's car was out near mine watched it and was wonderful for sympathizing with me and saying, no, I heard what they were saying, you were right. I really needed that. I know what it sounds like when wheels are spinning, but it did get back into its parking space.

At that point, the snow was still coming down and the news kept saying roads were closing due to accidents. I decided to stay the night so had to go back out to get my bag and then upstairs for tea. Thankfully a local restaurant did deliver, I had a disappointing dinner from them last night and a good pizza today. That will be dinner too. Tomorrow I'll head out early and probably drive straight to the interview hotel then go collapse where I'm staying. And at this job conference, a lot of places want to talk to me, if I miss some, I'll know I've tried and they will too.

In good news, as the cable in the hotel wasn't working, I finally watched Finding Dory, which is a complicated movie. It has some good and not so much messages about disability but overall lovely. I've also finally started reading Goldenhand and I'm liking it a lot better than Clariel. It has the faster movement to it that I liked in the other books. The Old Kingdom is a world that I'm happy to revisit. And In the Heart of the Sea is on TV too, so far its beautifully made.

Life is a lot but from my experience of heading up to Boston last time for apartment searching, I know that New England states do know how to deal with snow. Tomorrow's drive won't be fun, but I think it will be manageable.

There's also all the mess of politics that I'm working on finding how to best create change and not be overwhelmed. Its hard but all of this is making me more certain than ever that I'm in the right profession where librarians and teachers work to protect and educate.
ceitfianna: (riding into the sun)
I really like Boston. I keep walking around and thinking of other cities that I've lived and worked in and loved. Its wonderful to be able to see friends and wander into amazing bookstores and places like the aquarium. Tomorrow I'm going to talk to my job agency and see what ideas they have for getting me closer to moving here. I know its not going to be easy but I can do this and there's an opening at the Boston Public library that I'm going to apply for.

Being here, I'm having this weird mixture of emotion. The main one is I could fit here and the other is my self doubt. I know what I can do and that I'll be able to do more in a place with all these options. Also I know that I'll do better when I have friends who are nearby to talk to and be around.

The last time I was in Boston was as part of a marching band trip and its been fascinating to go back to places that I remember. I like how easy Boston is to walk and the T has even been fairly nice to me. My 7 day pass decided to stop working and there's only one store, so I'll deal with that tomorrow but its easy to get around. Today I picked up Seanan McGuire's newest book which I'll probably read in one or two sittings, I tend to do that with her books. Life is good and I think I can see where my road is heading next.

Two of the horoscopes I read gave me two phrases that keep going through my head as I walk around and plan-'not empty but open' and 'your instincts are glittering and sharp, use them'.
ceitfianna: (Tumnus)
I just picked a show and booked tickets to see the new production of Fiddler on the Roof on January 14th. I'll be staying two nights and I'm really looking forward to this. Picking a show was hard but then I found a great deal on seats and snapped it up.

New York folks, I will be in contact about possible meetings as I'll have Friday all to myself.

Lovely day

Jun. 9th, 2015 05:21 pm
ceitfianna: (Tumnus)
One of the main things I was hoping for from this little birthday trip was to find new places to discover and learn, which happened. In the morning, we went to Annmarie Garden, a wonderful sculpture garden with a glorious combination of items. There were monumental sculptures, small ones and fairy homes made by local people scattered around. It was a place that invited wandering even though it wasn't huge. My Instagram and Tumblr sites are full of the pictures I took, because everywhere I looked something caught my eye. Places like that make me happy since they're about enjoying and creating art, they run classes and have an Art Lab along with a pretty gift shop. Also being in the shade was much appreciated since the weather has gotten hotter.

Then we went to lunch at the local cafe which was great, delicious food and a friendly atmosphere. Everyone here is nice and that makes the trip even nicer.

After lunch, we headed to Calvert Marine Museum which was so well done. They had natural history, amazing fossils including a discussion of a fossil whale skull and how it was transported to the museum. There were also living exhibits showing the different types of fish that live in this area and some good discussion of invasive species. The history section was interesting, I love seeing the tools of the oyster trade. Best of all was that outside, they had two river otters who were playing and I was able to get a few picture. Otters make me happy.

Now I'm sitting in the B&B watching the marina as my phone charged after I used up all the battery taking pictures.
ceitfianna: (Charles+Raven-here to hold you)
Today I'm 34 and am at the moment sitting in a lovely room at a B&B off the Patuxent River. My health has been a little iffy as my stomach's deciding not to play nice but dessert tonight was a key lime brulee that was amazing.

I feel hopeful and while I'm currently very tired, I'm also happy. Summer decided to show up so that the walk to explore town ended up a lot more tiring than I expected but its meant to rain tonight which should cool everything down. East coast humid heat is one of my least favorite things but there are breezes here that smell of salt water which make me happy.

I discovered that the earrings came from my older brother and apparently there's another pair on the way. Tomorrow I'm going to wander around a sculpture garden and possibly a Marine museum before lunch on the harbor at a restaurant across the way from the B&B. Life is feeling good and I'm hopeful as I look forward into a new year.
ceitfianna: (Charles+Raven-here to hold you)
I made it safely after a long train ride halfway across the US and I'm now comfortable in my hotel room. Earlier I had a walk around the convention center neighborhood which as nice after sitting for so long. There was one horrible moment when my first train was running late and I thought that I'd miss my second but didn't. I'm looking forward to the conference which I know will keep me busy and I'm going to try and not bring too many books back with me, I can only carry so many.

Now for an interesting meme from [personal profile] in_the_blue: You know that meme that goes around sometimes where you post your five favorite kinks and then five favorite couples, and it's like a wish into the universe to see if anybody will write it for you? Let's make it a little more interactive.

Comment here if you want to play, and I will give you 3-6 couples that I associate with you, and you make an entry in your journal talking about those couples and fics that you wish the universe would write for you.


She gave me:

Tumnus & Lucy: This is a tricky one for me as I don't think there's anything I crave hugely about these two. There's so much great fic and sometimes weird fic out there about them. I'm always happy to see more of them learning and sharing together about their different worlds and especially history. I would love to see more of Tumnus' backstory and how Lucy reacts to it because he clearly feels complicated about what he did during the Witch's reign. Also I'd wonder more about how Lucy's experiences before Narnia play a part in their friendship.

Charles & Erik: These two are another with a lot of fic out there about them, but the kind that makes me happy is when they're confronting how honestly messed up their lives can be. They're both good at their various solutions and fantastic chemistry, but its the tough stuff in between of their relationship that I want more of. This would fill a hole for me from the movies because they skipped over a lot of years and pushed too quickly, missing out a lot of chances to see Charles and Erik working together. I wanted to know if they tried to communicate after Cuba or not, all the messy parts. How did the others react to them since one reason I love the X-Men is that no matter the iteration, they're a family and that kind of relationship effects everyone.

Charles & Raven: I think my tumblr tag for these two best captures the kind of fic I want; best messed up siblings. I want to read about them going to school, being in New York, how do they fit in with other kids, when did Raven tell Charles to never read her mind? I've actually started a few fics along these lines but haven't finished them yet but I adore their relationship. In First Class, its clear that they have a history, worries, in-jokes and I want to see how they got there.

It turns out my answers were longer than I expected but I like this meme. Maybe after the conference when I'm hanging out next week, I might even get some fic writing done.
ceitfianna: (Charles+Raven-here to hold you)
Yesterday I finally saw The Winter Soldier and wow that movie, I need to see it again.

Thoughts with some spoilers are under here. )

I need to see it again and I'm coming to love the soundtracks of Henry Jackman, his music just works. He did the soundtrack for X-Men: First Class and I heard him interviewed on an NPR show about movie soundtracks.

My jet lag is getting better and its wonderful to not have anything huge coming up in the near future other than family visiting for Easter. I keep looking back at the last month and a half where I did three weeks of fact-checking, to DC for the job then out to LA for an interview and it makes sense that not a lot of other things have been happening. But all that traveling has my words coming again. I'm hoping to write some queer fest fics and today I wrote a librarian blog: Busy days: Fact-checking and the school librarian as goalie.

Oh and ages ago, I put up a prompt meme with a 100 prompts. Its still open as writing for other people always works well for me.
ceitfianna: (Inception-look sideways)
Since my last post, there's a lot to catch up on. I spent most of Friday walking around New York City, getting lost around Little Italy, losing wonderful amounts of time at The Strand's cheap book racks and then getting to go to the New Zealand mission to the UN. Also there was lunch with [personal profile] skygiants and more hanging out with [profile] arushindoll. I love being close enough that I can actually go and visit New York City again, because whenever I go, I end up feeling revitalized by how alive and active the city is. My feet weren't happy with me because I ended up truly footsore but I have good sandals so few blisters.

The alum reception for Victoria University was charming, it was very New Zealand; not too formal, great food and wine and an interesting lecture on climate change. It reminded me how lucky I am to have connections to New Zealand and that someday, I will get myself back there. I also have found a good way to get to NY and other points north from Lewes as with my car, I can drive to stations that have direct routes instead of navigating multiple transit systems. I plan on having more trips to New York and DC and Philly in the near future, some hopefully for interviews but mainly to see people.

Then Saturday I traveled back to have a nice dinner with my parents, older brother and nieces as we all prepared for my father's birthday on Sunday. The party went really well. I made a huge batch of my chickpea salad recipe and had lots of great conversations of people going what are you up to and how are you doing? There was only one talk that made me wince about libraries since there's someone who works with Johns Hopkins and they're removing all books from their library. The wince wasn't the person I was having the conversation with just knowing that such a large organization has made that choice to go fully online as medical journals as so expensive, that they're worth more than books. Its a tough turn of events and it worries me that such an institution has gone so completely to the only instead of looking for a place in between.

Monday was restful, I started the day by going to the local library to help with shelving books and talking to the youth director who's a mentor of mine. This Sunday is the first meeting of their LEGO robotics team so I'm going to go help her. Robotics is something I want to know about and it will be great to get experience with it.

Tuesday was my sister's birthday and we went to a pretty nature center and watched the birds. I took a lot of pictures then we had a quiet evening. This morning my mother had cataract surgery which seems to have gone well and I'm trying to get myself a looking for jobs routine.

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